Something Borrowed

How often do we not live our own lives?

I’ve been thinking recently about the decisions I make and where I’m heading with my career and life in general. How much of who I currently am is because I think that is what I should be, not because that is what I really really want to be.

When I moved to Bloem almost two years ago I found a cosy one bedroom flatto live in, and for the first time ever I was really living on my own. Not with parents/siblings/roomates/friends next door to help me decide what should go where or when I should do what.

And I found this oddly liberating.

Never before did I really realize how easily I am influenced by what and who is sharing my space with me. All of I sudden I could do what I want, when I wanted to. In that first year I loved getting to know myself again, exploring and sometimes just rediscovering what music and movies I really liked, how I wanted to decorate and arrange my house, cooking and even a bit of piano playing(which is still a work in slow progress…) And although I enjoyed all the house mates of the previous few years I know now that one of the best ways to know who you are and make peace with it is to really be by yourself, for more than 15 minutes…

This spills into the rest of our lives as well as these things normally tend to do. Think about it how many people do you know that are doctors/engineers/lawyers/lazy/stuck in one place just because that is what their parents/peers expected of them? Or what they think is expected of them, because our perception of other people’s perception can be so wrong sometimes.

This especially challenges us when we have to consider new adventures. Do we dare even if it is not what others would consider? (Side note: Inevitably the question of  obeying what God says even when it seems extreme comes into play here, read this blog I saw this morning and challenged me again in this area)

In the last 2 weeks I had to consider the possibility of new ventures in new places and although for now I am staying put I find that I have a new excitement about where I am know. I’ve come to the conclusion that sometimes you have to explore the alternatives to know that you are where you should be at moment. For me this exercise has opened my eyes to new opportunities in staying, that for some reason I couldn’t see a week ago…

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.” Isaiah 55:6

“Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him, and he will act.” Psalm 37:5

“You must be imaginative, strong-hearted. You must try things that may not work.” – Gusteau (Ratatouille)

Are you living your life the way He says?